Are you looking to exert some control over your thoughts? Here are some tips and guidelines that you can follow to help stop thinking about sex.
Understand that there is nothing wrong with thinking about sex
It’s entirely natural, and everyone does it. Biologically speaking, it is next to impossible to stop thinking about sex completely, as your body instinctively drives to reproduce. However, it’s possible for that urge to become more like background noise as you go through your everyday life.
Know your triggers
Sex is not always the topic that gets you thinking about sex. Sometimes pure boredom with life begins an automated response that looks for entertainment, and eventually leads to thinking about sex. There are a number of triggers. If you can identify your triggers, you can limit their capacity to veer you into thinking about sex. Stress is a huge trigger for sex, and thinking about sex.
Develop your willpower. If you truly want to stop thinking about sex, you need to make a commitment to yourself and stick with it. At a minimum, you should make a goal to curb your sexual thoughts so that they don’t distract you from your other daily activities, such as work or school. If you need help remembering your commitment, wear a piece of jewelry or a simple string around your wrist that will remind you to power through the temptation to get lost in thought.
Sublimate your urges
Sublimation, or sexual transmutation, occurs when you translate your sex drive into creative energy. Take the time you’d usually spend thinking about sex and instead devote it to a creative hobby, such as writing, painting, sculpting, or playing music. If it’s something you really enjoy, it can provide you with an alternate avenue for catharsis and satisfaction.
Distract yourself with other activities. If you’re not in a place where you can do a creative hobby, try exercising. If you’re working out hard enough, you shouldn’t be able to focus on much of anything. Alternatively, get lost in an engrossing book or movie, or take up a team sport. While outside activities are probably not going to get thoughts about sex completely off your mind, it will help to facilitate other thoughts outside of sex.
Don’t leave too much idle time in your schedule
Everyone needs time to relax, but finding yourself with hours of time on your hands might lead to backsliding. Schedule your day full with events and activities to better yourself. Leave a bit of time at the end of the day for reflection and relaxation, but not so much that you’ll get bored.
Tell someone about your problem. As terrifying as this may sound, it is one of the most powerful and effective approaches. If you are lucky enough to know someone who is not judgemental and will understand and appreciate your goal (and forgive you, if the circumstances warrant), talk to them at least once a day about how you are doing. Have a frank conversation any time you feel compelled to think or act in ways you would rather not. It is surprising how much less compelling these thoughts appear when brought into the light of day, and how much less powerful.
If all else fails, try to think of something decidedly unsexy
Car horns, sewage nails on a chalkboard — whatever it is that completely turns you off, dredge up that image if you need to stop thinking about sex suddenly. It should be the mental equivalent of taking a cold shower.
Don’t rely on this technique too often, as it’s not a long-term solution. Use it only for situations in which you need to stop thinking about sex immediately.
If you are in a relationship, do something for your partner. Use your sexual drive as a resource to act in a loving and caring manner. Be romantic!
If there is one person that turns you on like crazy, try to discreetly avoid that person.
Don’t frustrate yourself over sexual thoughts. Remember that everyone else thinks about sex too. What matters is that you can still go on with your daily life without letting something as silly as sex bother you.
Talk to your parent of the same sex, you will be amazed at how wise they are.
If you are religious, you may consider visiting your local priest/pastor/religious Advisor, he/she might have various techniques to help you. Remember that you are not alone.
Spend your time reading books or listening to music.
Meditation works too!
Relax and be cool.
If you’re female, your hormonal birth control could have the side effect of increasing your libido. Ask your doctor if you can switch to a less androgenic formula (androgens are related to testosterone, which increases libido in people of both sexes).
Written By Engr Wells Dare